My dream brother

My dearest boss happened to call me right the time I was writing my diary, I have no more tears to drop for few minutes during our conversation, he said so many right things even if he already got drunk, I trusted him as he were in his normal sense, he still be the same person that I’ve admired for years, I had no clue what make things right until I met him, I wish if he were my real brother.

He’s deserved to be a very happy and successful person in all world. I’m blessed to have a wonderful privilege moment being with him for years, he’s amazing man to every women, he’s a very grateful son to his parent, he’s very good brother to their family, but to me he’s even better and more special respectful person.


I have to keep smiling for the big move, I’m glad I made it through.. My beloved boss, he is the same person to make me cry,  it’s of course tear of joys. I’m honestly impressed by his encouragement attitude toward me. I have guts to move my life on while everyone wish me to be stronger and wanted me to walk forward to better new days, though I’m not supposed to let them down because of my weakness any longer.

The words on the air blow me feel even more better than cool breezes, as an idealistic inspiration to me, to wake me up from a very coldest place and darkest night… nightmares no longer with me when he’s begun to express me his good feeling about me, act as a real brother existed in reality on my lonely world.

I’m not really sure, how he does understand well about what I’m eager in my real world needs, brother you absolutely read my mind.. he said he like and love me be his real sister, and he wanted me to know that..  he said he wanted me to live stronger and to be a better person in the future.

I’m speechless and I didn’t know how to keep our conversation go further, I never knew that I would have been finally treated so nice and warm from a person that I wish I could be someone who can help in my entire life to.. I wish I could if only I would be able to reach his needs.

Thank you so much my brother, I’m very much grateful for the time being with you and I’m very excited about everything and words you have told and guided me right from wrong, you have brighten up my life, and you build a bridge of confidence for me to go on.


.. And special thank once again for your best concerning about my life, your call at the moment has been considered as an eventful anniversary moment for me to celebrate annually. I’ll remember just like this until my memory won’t be able to memorize things.

I would never say good bye to you, but I wish to say farewell to everyone but you.. Even I’m no longer be able to contribute as much as I could for you and the place I’ve been working for years, that why those countless memories pull out teardrops every time I read your words. Needless to say I’ll learn to live stronger and I’ll remember all your words, it’s very obvious to us that we love each other faithfully.


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The sad love story

As I begun to write about A sad love story as I was weeping, and I was trying to wipe off those useless tears that keep rolling down one after another as non stop running tears when the boy came to an old studio where he often came to play the unfinished lyric of guitar. I was crying like a kid waiting for her dad to be back home. My dad will never be home like he used to because he’s changed his destiny.. He can never be the same. Cool breezes bring and recall back my miserable and sadden memories with those running nose and tears, I hate her again…

I’m not sure what type of person who I am but I’m seriously hate myself for being so weak. Why would I always need to put smile on my dummy face each time I go out or anytime I meet people when the heart keep crying quietly as she’s been practicing to be a new person who’s never existed, yet a strongest person like she act one. I don’t want that way and I don’t want to be all alone every single night and days because revolutionary living have made them move on pretty well as I hate those confidences of revolution as I honestly hate myself. I can’t be a right person or wrong one but I never ruin anyone life and I wonder why I still in the same bad position in their eyes. I’m not gonna ask for forgiveness nor sympathy from those who care in my own business. Why people never enough of what they own.

I’m only a simple human be, it is not easy to live a simple life in all darkest nights without optimization of possible reflection.
I’ve only begun thy writing when I’m inspired by one of a very sad love film I’ve ever seen, a series movie, THE SAD LOVE STORY..

To night the film brought me this emotional sensation as I almost forgot how to write things to move further.. But tonight, and I hope I could make a big move with what future would, life goes on and I’ll be fine and survived..
I’m not gonna say that I can’t live without you, I am okay and can live without you,.. I just don’t want to..