I have always expected things go right by invest all hardest effort to every single thing I do but I never forget to enjoy every momentum with that person… I told myself when things go wrong, you’re not alone, life is tough but interesting.. I begun to put another efforts and try to find ways around, I talk as I walk.. God loves me as my mom.. Inner spirit appear when in need.. In deed, I’m blessed and there is always a helping hand in the exact moment, I can’t figure it out who that person is, invisible and often come to cheer me whenever I was downs.
At every 4am last weeks, she did not listen to me, she was depressed and frustrated for some reasons, nothing seemed to be alright, foods she used to like could not convince her any longer, music helped her in previous time were giving insanity, truly drive me nut.. phone on but no answer.. Everyone is worried, where on earth this woman is? Her family were sad too.. She is a trouble maker, isn’t she?
Music is her life, coffee is her soul, people are her friends, but family is everything…
At some points in her life, but back to the right track, she was very happy and I asked what is the special night to make this woman keep smiling in the middle of the night.. Raindrops and tears were falling apart.. Silence and little note were recording as she begun to tell me the reason of her happiness, tears of joys, again? As she knocked her head.. Look, tonight seemed to be fast, she did not want to end up her dream, she is forced to stop by 4.30am by the time I just finished emails and she fell asleep at the desk, her boss woke up and blamed.. Did you get yourself drunk? Did you had a good time last night? If you don’t know how to drink, why would you drink? She pretended to not hear anything and stayed quiet inside the cool blanket.. Silly this girl,
She could not reply as I started to explain instead, I knew this girl almost 31 years, she is nobody to everyone and she choose to be somebody if she can’t be herself, not a big deal just a fake drinker, not sure why she had to drink.. I woke her up and recall last night dream., silly her, that completely crazy her.. Are you insane? she was telling all story to someone, he seemed to be familiar, she told me, he is someone that she have met many times, someone she knew, someone is keen to be her good listener, she became a talkative person in front of him.. She feels secured and safe to be with him, she was protected well.. I can’t find the reason why..
The music sounds familiar, the places look family, she could not explain further as her boss entered, it’s almost time to leave this good memory behind, the smell of loneliness recalled, I said stop dreaming and wake up, I’ll buy you ice-cream.. and promise me to stop dreaming,
She wanted to remember just like that,
She wanted to embrace the moment tight,
She wanted to stop the time,
She wanted to be there..
She wanted to hear his voice..
She wanted to see his smile..
I don’t understand this girl, I warned her again.. No daydream and no further expression.. You should have not such a person anymore., don’t know if she was listening to me, she was not there, she left me a sad letter as she had disappeared…
I’m too sad that I could not help her.. Thank for our precious moment,
Thank you to make me smile,
Thank you for the nice treat,
Thank you for listening,
Thank you to make my dreams come true,
Thank to tell that I were tall while I’m not,
Thank to say I was pretty even though it is not true,
Thank you for everything..
“The only thing more impossible than staying… was leaving” instead of praying.